


An Alternative to Lighthouse Keeping

by credence



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Actors, Dad!Scott, M/M, Movie AU, PA AU, Stiels/Derek, he is basically batman, in the sad sense this isn't a batman au, like everything involving derek is sad, little bit of angst in the middle but mostly alright, sterek, that one where derek is forced to be stiles PA
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-02-27 01:43:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,381
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2674208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/credence/pseuds/credence
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Stiles, meet your new PA! Derek, meet the public relations work I was talking about."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Bad Time to use Finger Guns

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic please be kind and tell me any errors. Thank you to thefutureischeesepants for being Beta than me at finding mistakes.

  
The small number of people in the hall outside the audition room was simultaneously encouraging and the most terrifying thing Stiles had ever experienced. There were seventeen other pale and wiry actors waiting to be called to read with Lydia Martin in front of the board. Stiles had seen Martin’s work on a few amateur films and could understand why Hale Industries had cast her as the star of their next big film Only River. Getting past the video auditions on a Hale production was impressive enough, but getting to do an active reading for Only River was freaking ridiculous. The young adult novel had sold over 30 million copies and the movie already had a phenomenal amount of hype. This was big. Stiles sitting just outside the door of Hale’s casting division, about to read for the role of the romantic lead was colossal. He was going to be sick. 

  
Inside the audition room was a long desk with Lydia Martin and two others seated behind it. Stiles recognised the attractive but terrifying woman in the centre as Laura Hale, but he couldn't place the older man to her left. 

  
“Hello Mr. Stilinski” Laura smiled at him across the table.  He smiled back at her in acknowledgement, or at least he hoped he did; his face kind of felt like he had drunk too many sour slurpies while getting Botox. Lydia gave him a look that indicated that his face looked exactly how it felt. Stiles stopped trying to smile. 

“Umm okay...” Laura continued, with a similar expression to Lydia’s “It says here that you have worked on a few pilots, and a short film that won an award at Sundance?” 

  
“Yes. I, ah, have done some spice girls covers on Youtube too.” He said winking as he clicked and fired finger guns at Laura. Oh god this was worse than he had ever imagined. He was going to leave here and crawl into a hole and never come out. Maybe he could work as a cat litter cleaner for Scott, or live as a hermit in a lighthouse somewhere. He could fill the lighthouse with coconuts dressed as people and then horrendously embarrass himself in front of them as well and burn the lighthouse down, then drown himself in the sea. 

  
Everyone stared at him for a moment and then Laura cleared her throat “Lets start the reading then. If you have your script that is.”   


  . . .  
  
That had to be the worst audition anyone had ever done in the history of acting. Stiles hands had been shaking so hard he hadn’t been able to see the script and ended up trying to recite the lines by memory. He had fucked up in the middle and covered with a bit of improv that thankfully Lydia had run well with, but when he was done everyone was silent and he thanked them and left before Stiles could make things any worse. Melissa tried calling him a few times around dinner but Stiles turned his cell off. He couldn't face how much he just blew the greatest opportunity of his career. At least for tonight he would drown his sorrows in greasy room service and minibar alcohol. Tomorrow he would start applying for jobs in lighthouses. 

  
The hotel room phone woke him in the morning. Head pounding Stiles squirmed across the bed until he could reach the side table.

“Stiles!” Melissa's voice yelled from the other end. Oh no, she was going to disown him as her client. He had brought shame upon her agency. He slumped half off the bed, miniature liquor bottles tumbling to the ground with his torso. “Why is your phone off I have been trying to contact you all night!” She chided. 

“I’m sorry Melissa. I’m so sorry. I was so nervous and the stupid comments just came out. I’ll look for light house jobs today. I am so very sorry.”

“What are you talking about Stiles? You got the job! They thought you were perfect for the role! Apparently Martin and you read really well together, and they loved your take on the character!” This didn't make sense. Stiles must be dreaming or the shame had driven Melissa mad. 

  
“What?” Stiles croaked.

  
“YOU GOT THE PART! You are playing Daniel Alban in Only River!”  
Stiles fell off the bed completely.


	2. First and Second Impressions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Laura plays matchmaker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh wow thanks for sticking around! To thefutureischeesepants, You are Beta than the best pie at the fair, thank you for fixing all my mistakes.

The next few months were a whirlwind of press, stylists, media conferences and photo shoots. They hadn’t even gotten to set and each of the leading cast was in the media spotlight. Suddenly everyone wanted to know everything they could about Stiles.  Campaigns to fund long forgotten pilots he acted in circulated the internet, an episode of a fox sci-fi he had been a extra in was one of the most viewed videos on Netflix, even the video of him lip-syncing to the spice girls on YouTube had over a million views. It was comforting to know that the majority of his cast members were experiencing the same sudden rise to fame as he was.

Well all of them aside from Jackson Whitemore. Whitmore was the poster boy for teenaged romance movies. Aside from staring in 4 of the top 10 rom-coms in the past few years he was also a spokes person for Kelvin Kline. Whitmore would be playing Eduard Colt, the sexy heartbreaker who battles with Daniel for River’s affections. From what Stiles had seen of Whitmore, he was all that and he knew it. He hated Stiles with a passion ever since Stiles tweeted a picture of Jackson drooling while asleep.

Out of his fellow cast he was closest to Lydia, who still believed he was as socially deficient as when they first met, but now did so in a way that suggested she thought it was endearing. She had gotten the social network manager Danny to help him remove any information about past relationships and other private information from accessible points on the Internet. All the public focus on his personal life was ridiculously terrifying. 

While the photo shoots and convention panels had been fun, he was dying to get on set. Stiles was terrified of being face to face with Director Laura Hale, but figured she must not hate him as much as he thought since she gave him the part. He would just smile, apologise for being awkward at first, and say how excited he is to be working with her.

Walking through the immaculate glass doors of Hale Industries HQ the day before shooting started renewed the excitement he had felt for the project when he had first been given the part. He had only been there a few times during the previous months and had never been to Laura’s office.  Or spoken to Laura. She had done a few convention panels but they had never matched up with Stiles photo shoot schedule. Not seeing her all this time made the stress of the whole thing so much worse. He took a deep breath as he pressed the elevator call button. He could do this. He had the entire ride up to collect his nerves and make a good second impression.

The elevator doors opened on an unfairly attractive and topless man blotting his dripping laptop with what Stiles assumed was the man’s coffee stained shirt. Sir Abdominal Muscles from Definition County looked up with a face like thunder; Beautiful, statuesque thunder. Stiles just stood their gaping at him until the elevator doors closed. After the joyous shock wore off, Stiles managed to push the elevator button in time to catch the next lift on its way up. Stepping inside he cursed the gods of poorly timed boners, as he looked across to see Laura Hale smiling back at him.  Stiles managed what he hoped was a stealthy shift of his satchel and did his best to hold a regular conversation while picturing his old coach Finstock in a bikini.

“So Stiles, while it’s nice to hear you have been enjoying all the promoting, I wanted to talk to you about what it will be like for you on set.” She gave Stiles a reassuring smile, “I know that we are scheduled to have a cast and crew meeting tomorrow but we haven’t had a chance to chat yet and I have a bit of a favour to ask of you.” Laura paused as she waited for Stiles to enter her office. Whatever the favour Laura wanted he would do it, he had a pet boa once. He knew he could kill, even if it was small rodents. “It’s a little unconventional and slightly unfair to you, but would you allow me to assign my brother Derek to you as your PA for the duration of filming?”

“What?” That had not been what Stiles was expecting.

“My brother Derek has been having some difficulty relating with the public over the past few years, and while I know he might be a handful at first I feel that forcing him to interact with real humans and not just analysing statistics will be beneficial for him. I know it's unfair to you Stiles, giving you a PA who won’t really want to be there, but you would be helping me out so much I would really owe you in the future.” Laura smiled at him from across her desk.

What could Stiles say, being owed a favour from one of the best directors in the industry would be like a golden ticket, and Stiles felt he could relate to the guy. According to the articles Stiles had read, Derek had lost his parents around the same age Stiles had lost his mum, and even though Stiles mum hadn’t been murdered buy an anti-homosexual extremist for donating 10% of a multimillion dollar corporation’s budget to LGBTQIA+ charities, he understood why the guy had dropped off the media radar.

“Of course Laura. I will do what I can to help.” The Dead Mum Club should stick together he added to himself.

“Great!” She beamed up at him, “Ah! Speak of the socially repressed devil. Derek! So nice of you to join us, even if you are late.”

“Sorry, I had a mishap with my coffee.” Said a disgruntled voice from behind him. Stiles whipped around to see Sir Abdominal Muscles standing stiffly in the doorway. At least now he was wearing a shirt, be it a too tight striped one.

“Stiles, meet your new PA! Derek, meet the public relations work I was talking about.”


	3. Eating Clean Keeps Them Keen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They interact in this chapter yay!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always to thefutureischeesepants. Lets grab cronuts some time, my shout. No seriously I really want one now what time do you finish work??

DEREK

Derek had not wanted his first meeting with Stiles Stilinski to go down like it just had. He was meant to run into him at one of the press parties, while wearing a smart tux and smile as he said something charming about seeing Stiles audition video and knowing he was a shoe-in for the part. Then Derek would complement Stiles on his performance at Sundance and mention that he had tried to speak to him then, but got called away before the after party. He would not mention how Derek had semi stalked Stiles media presence since he became a part of Only River and watched all his stupid YouTube videos, because that would be creepy. He would also have not been covered in hot coffee and trying to dry his ruined laptop with his shirt. Unfortunately things usually did not always work out well for Derek Hale.

"Uh hey, I know you didn't want to be my PA but I promise it won't be that bad. It's not like I'm going to get all Devil Wears Prada on you." Stiles said. He was clearly as confused by the situation as Derek was, probably more so since Derek thought he knew his sisters motivation behind forcing this fate upon them.

"I am not going to be your PA." Derek muttered as he marched out of the office after Laura. He took the stairs in the hope of catching the elevator a few floors down, but she must have been holding the ground button because the elevator skipped his floor. She couldn't avoid him forever; he knew where she lived.

Laura was eating lunch at her favourite pizza parlour when Derek finally tracked her down. He slid into the booth across from her wearing his best ‘stay out of my life’ face. He waited for her to look up from her pizza to appreciate and fear his glare but she continued to eat the remanning two slices before she looked up.

“I’m not doing it.” He said.

“Derek”

“This is ridiculous. I barely have spare time with my current duties, I’m not going to add running around to get other peoples coffee to my ever growing list of responsibilities! I know you think I like the kid because you found that teen vogue magazine at my house but I told you that was kora’s. And couldn't you have just arrange a cocktail party or something where we were both invited to?”

"Derek you haven’t gone to meet any of the people I tried to set you up with at cocktail parties. You haven’t gone to meet anyone since Kate."  
He fell still. Laura reached out to reassuringly squeeze his hand before she continued. "And I am not saying you have to persue Stiles romantically, or any of that. I just feel like forcing you to get out of the house and to interact with such a forceful ball of positive energy might help."

She squeezed his hand again.

"You don't have to be Stile’s PA if you don't want to, but Derek, I think you would be good for each other. You are well over due for leave since you haven’t taken a holiday in years, and I already have a team standing by to cover your workload. If it doesn't work out after a month I will get a replacement without a fuss. But please give it a go."

Derek stared at her. He owed her to at least try.

"Ok. But it will only be for the month."

“ And Derek?” Laura smiled sweetly at him.

“yeah?”

“Kora wouldn't have left that photo shoot open in the bathroom.” 

•••  
Stiles was really confused. Laura had sort of dropped the PA bomb and then vanished with Derek close on her heals. Now Stiles was standing alone in Laura's office with no idea what was going on. Was Laura even Derek's superior? Could she order him to be a PA? I mean he was one of two remaining heirs to a media empire, surely he could just say no? Was it a joke? Should he just go home and wait for someone to call him? After a few minutes of awkwardly standing around he decided to hit up his favourite diner and then if he still hadn’t heard anything by the time he got home he would send Laura an email.  
Stiles was forcing down a third helping of curly fries when he got a text from a number he didn't recognise.

 

-Where are you?

im eatin lunch who is this?-

-Derek. What is your address?

 

While Betty's did amazing milkshakes and had his favourite meal of all time -a bacon cronut, served with an extra large maple syrup and doughnut milkshake- it felt like the kind of place beautiful, healthy and successful people like Derek would turn their noses up at. Or maybe even be physically ill at the thought of. Stiles flipped his phone in his hand nervously. There was a health bar two blocks away that served all raw vegan meals. That sounded hip and like something someone who had their life together would like. 

I’m at The Forest,  
its near Drewr Park on  
the side with the big fountain.-

-I know the one. I’ll be there shortly. 

 

Stiles panicked, it would take him at least 5 min to run there what if Derek was closer than that? He would look like a dick if he said he was somewhere he wasn't. Stiles through his money plus a tip on the table and ran from the store, limbs flailing in all directions.  
His shirt was stained by sweat and probably tears of pain by the time he got there. Derek was not inside, which was a huge relief, since Stiles thought he might die and he didn't want his last action to be in vain. Maybe he shouldn’t have picked this place; every one was really athletic and attractive. At least at Betties he looked like a men’s health model in comparison to the other clientele.  
He ordered something that sounded like he would make his dad drink, and took a seat moments before Derek walked through the door. He looked really annoyed. Fuck, the last thing Stiles wanted to do was piss of one of the most powerful people in film, even if it was Laura’s fault originally. Stiles waved to get Derek’s attention and accidentally knocked over a jar of stivia powder. 

“You are red.” Derek said after sitting down and staring at Stiles for what felt like an eternity of awkward, painful, judgemental seconds. 

“Haha.. uhh. yeah. I was jogging in the park.” That was plausible! Derek would totally believe that. He would have no concept of how much Stiles jogged. Stiles could jog all the time! 

There was an awkward silence and Stiles worried he had missed a question while congratulating himself on a smooth excuse. 

“You can borrow my spare gym shorts.” Derek blurted out.

Was that a thing gym people did? Stiles nodded unsure on what the correct answer to that would be and tried not to think creepy thoughts involving Derek’s Gym shorts. 

“I mean, if you forget your gym clothes again,” Derek corrected. “I keep some in the office, if you urgently need gym clothes. So you don't have to run in skinny jeans. As you PA I am sure I could lend them to you.” Derek’s face was slightly flushed, he must have been passive aggressively reminding stiles of the absurd situation they were in and Stiles nodding like Derek owed him his gym shorts pissed Derek off. 

“Oh, no Derek, I mean you don't have to be my PA, not that you need my permission, but that's ridiculous- I think Laura must have been playing a joke on me? I am sorry I waisted your time with this, you didn't have to come here I didn't expect you to, I'm so sorry.” Stiles felt like such a dick. His face was glowing in shame. 

For a second Stiles thought Derek was going to reach for his hand but he picked up the stivia jar Stiles had knocked over and put the packets back in it. 

“It wasn't a joke. I owe Laura and she has picked this as punishment for me. It’s not fair on you and I am sorry. It will only be for a month and then we will get you a real PA.” Derek smiled at him reassuringly. 

“Oh. Uhm well if it’s for a month I am sure I can manage by myself, I mean you must have more important things to do.” He could always ask Lydia to get her PA to grab his coffee order when they picked up hers, and he could keep track of a months worth of things. Maybe. If he took enough Adderall. 

“No that would be unfair to you. Laura will keep tabs on us anyway, and she has hired a team to look after everything I would normally take care of. I wouldn't be surprised if she had someone keeping tabs on us.” 

Stiles looked out the window half expecting to see Laura staring back at him. God she was terrifying. 

“I will look over the shooting timetable and arrange for you to be picked up and dropped off from sets, or to interviews and what ever else you need.” Derek continued.

He was so professional and intimidating. Why couldn't Stiles have had some goofy intern as a PA instead of this business-minded Hugo Boss model. 

“Well this will be different.” Stiles said as he took a sip of his green liquid. It was disgusting and he accidentally spat some out as he tried to smile through the gross. 

Derek grimaced back at him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading folks!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
